solanaone (1) guy
$allan
he is not going to do anything for you
he is just going to sit there
that is the whole thing
grab him
01 / the asset
a tired red man
you know him
he wears a tie and nothing else
he has one (1) eye per side. both got tired of you first
nobody asked for this coin
nobody asked for allan either
and yet
02 / utility
we checked
there is none
03 / price discovery
the chart
it goes one way
you can drag it up
it will not stay
drag it. go on
04 / holders
a lot of allans
each one exactly as unbothered as the last
put your cursor in them
they scatter
they come back
they always come back
05 / evidence
documented
drag them around
he does not mind
06 / acquisition
how to buy
- 01get a walletphantom. solflare. it genuinely does not matter
- 02put sol in itthat part is between you and your bank
- 03paste the contractcheck it twice. nobody here is going to check it for you
- 04sit downthis is the part allan is good at
- 05wait for september 23there will be cake. not for you
07 / creator rewards · his birthday
september 23
every creator reward this coin earns is set aside for @basicallyedd
she is allan's muse. the show said so, in the credits
she bakes him a cake every year
he does not eat it. he is a drawing
the tweet below proves the cake
the rewards are our word. the wallet goes here when it exists
creator rewards are the fees the launchpad pays whoever launched the token. all of them, not a cut
08 / the muse
documented by the one person he tolerates
she has photographed him for years
he has not smiled for it once
the receipts
09 / the tapes
footage
eight tapes. all of them memes
they play one after the other
tap one
10 / questions nobody asked
faq
- is this financial advice
- he has never given advice. he has never given anything
- wen moon
- he is on a bench
- is there a roadmap
- there is a bench
- what does allan do at smiling friends
- he is there. that is the role
- can i talk to the dev
- the dev is sitting next to allan and has the same energy
- will he ever smile
- once. it was worse. see the mirror
- what if it goes to zero
- then it will finally match his enthusiasm
- does he know about the coin
- he knows about everything. he chooses this
| 09:00 | sit |
| 12:00 | sit |
| 15:00 | look at you |
| 18:00 | sit |
| 23:00 | tie stays on |
| 03:00 | check the chart. nothing changed |